Misc

I'm behind on writing all my blogs, but this one most. Catching up: I've had some trouble maintaining my INR—I've shifted medicines, so the one week it went to 7.6, then two weeks later it was down to 1.8....It seems to be leveling out again, now. I also received another form from Disability—this one focused on  what I can and cannot do in my everyday life. The one question asked what I could do before the illness that I couldn't do now—I think we ended up with an entire page, but really, that could fill a book. The form was supposed to take half an hour to fill out—it took us five. Ugh. I have to go for a psychological eval Sept. 10th—the stroke left me with such bad social anxiety that I can't imagine trying to function in a workplace. Being in social situations wears me out, even if I don't have panic attacks—I don't have any energy to spare!

I've done a little more canning—I figured out why it works for me, even with all the fatigue: the hardest part about canning is really the prep and I tend to do most of that the day before I actually can. But I still feel like I've really accomplished something. I switched to ladling everything, so no lifting or pouring pans of hot liquid. ;-)

I've been having trouble lately dealing with the friend situation. I feel forgotten, with only a few people even remembering about me. Everyone else's lives have just gone on—I feel like I'm running in the dust of a car and waving my arms and the driver won't glance back. Then there are the people who would opt for running over me... It's self-pitying, I know—I'm not sure why it's bugging me so much and why I can't get over it. Maybe because I just found out that one of my friends that hasn't forgotten me, is getting married and moving to DC in a couple of months. Not sure. But memories, especially of failed, past relationships and friendships are haunting me...